Child Education
The initial state of happiness about an own child is often overcome with annoyance after even a short period of time. Children quickly grow an own personality, and it’s the most vital task of the parents to help develop it and give it a shape. Otherwise, the little angel can turn into a little devil adding considerably to the stress in life you already have.
Like everything else in life, child education is a tightrope walk between strictness and letting loose. Drifting off either way causes more problems than it solves. But of course what sounds clear and obvious in theory is much harder to actually apply practically.
The suggestions here are no rules to follow, they’re mere guidelines and should animate own thoughts and ideas. After all, it’s up to you what you think is best.
1. Discipline
Discipline can become considerably harder to apply, but is vital to steer the course of your child’s further development. It has to learn that the authority and decision is with the parents. Still, love and forgiveness is of even importance. Especially the father’s role as an authority for the child and support for his wife can make this period a lot easier.
With increasing mobility, skill and curiosity a child between two and three years can keep its mother constantly busy, taking every moment of silence as an indication of a new disaster involving eating things, messing around with things and getting stuck in things.
This can really add to the load of stress parents already have, and the explosive emotional or even physical reaction might ease the moment, but on the long term increases the problem. So be as relaxed as possible and make sure you’ve got all valuable pieces of household equipment properly secured. When children receive a bump or scratch that’s no drama – turning it into one will just make you and your child over-freightened in the future. Still, with all calmness, don’t miss to tell your child when it did wrong and discipline when it’s overdoing it.
So even though your child becomes more independent, it’s important that you have time together and show interest in its experiences, interests and problems. Offer to talk about things, but don’t urge. Show understanding and always be there as someone your child can talk to without fear – remember the days when you were in that age, and your feelings at that time.
And, most important: Be a paradigm to your child. You cannot expect it to do something you don’t have the power or courage to do yourself. Respect is nothing that can be taught, but has to be earned, even by parents.
2. Rules of thumb
- Be just : Don’t expect your child to behave according to rules you haven’t set. Especially young children often can’t distinguish between right and wrong. So even if something is clearly a stupid idea for you, it might seem a brilliant one to it.
- Be firm : If you give in to your child’s defiant reaction, maybe because you’re just tired of the whole thing, you lose much more than that fight. You give away authority and respect.
- Forgive: After a confrontation is settled, reassure your child of your love and show that you’re not resentful.
- Don’t ask for the impossible: No matter what your means of education are like, you can’t expect a child to behave like an adult. Children sometimes behave irresponsibly – that’s built-in.
- Don’t forget the love: In the end, no matter how much trouble you might have with each other, don’t forget to show that you love your child. And when it comes to decide how to educate, how to reward and how to discipline, listen to your heart what’s the right thing to do.
Author: Brigitte Meier
